Well, no more.

I had a profound experience a few days ago when I went dancing. Despite being in my early 30s I still enjoy dancing at a nightclub whenever I have the time and don’t have to be up on a Saturday morning. Dancing has always been a great emotional release for me, but I noticed some time ago that my dance style had changed from what it was when I was regularly clubbing in my late teens and early 20s. I had attributed the change to new styles of music and had assumed that I was merely adapting to my age. This past Friday though, I was tired of fitting into the crevices of space that no one else had claimed. Instead, I was the one claiming the amount of space I needed to dance and it felt fantastic. I danced a lot more than I have in a  long time.

So, what changed? I’ve been going through a difficult time the last few weeks with some of the projects I’ve been working on. I freelance, so I don’t have a set job or schedule, and while it’s great that plenty of people have been demanding of my time, it’s also opened up my eyes to how much of my own work I give away, among other things. But it’s also made me realize that I hesitate on all sorts of projects that I want to spend time on – everything from writing, submitting completed fiction, starting new initiatives and ventures, and even this blog. It sounds so silly to me now, even though just a few days ago I posted on my personal twitter that I felt like I had to apologize for my own existence.

After my epiphany on Friday, I had the opportunity to help a friend who is battling with depression and with their own struggles for wanting more out of their job and relationship. How many times have we heard someone say “who do you think you are?” or “why do you think you can do this when so many people never succeed”.  With my new frame of mind, I was able to encourage my friend to be bold and remind them that they had the strength to keep going. At first I wondered if it sounded like I was offering mere platitudes, but it’s easy to underestimate how important encouragement can be, especially to those of us who haven’t been.

It also reminded me of the reason I started this blog, but that quickly got lost as other possibilities for how to best use this blog came up. Ultimately, I want to create a space where I can encourage and support anyone’s creative endeavours. There are so many critics, but not enough cheerleaders. Even when I’m editing, and I edit on average over 50 short stories per year, I try to judge each story on it’s own merit and find something that the author did well. I think this is important, not because writers’ have fragile egos, but because it’s important for each writer to understand what they do well, so that they can move on and focus on learning the skills that they’re not as strong in. It saddens me how many good stories will never be shared with the world, just because a given author was never encouraged. So, I’m going to carve out a space for myself in this blog, dare to speak and exist, and tell you, the reader, that it’s ok for you to be bold and to want to make your dreams come true.

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Bentos

Lunch in a Box: Building a Better Bento
If you’re new to bento-making, I really recommend “Lunch in a Box”. Be sure to check out the FAQ and top tips to read about the basic principles of bento-ing.

Bento Lunches community
Once you’re ready to start sharing your bentos, you can showcase them on the “Bento Lunches” community on LiveJournal. Lurking helped me learn what works and what doesn’t and gave me the confidence to try it out myself.

Fashion

The Fashion Police – Fighting Crimes of Fashion
Features a great mix of high fashion, affordable trends, and fashion disasters. Images and witty writing keep me coming back.

Personal Finance

The Simple Dollar – Financial Talk for the Rest of Us
One of the best blogs around for personal finance and frugality, updated several times a day. The writing style is clear and personable, the topics varied and easily applicable. There’s a reason he’s ranked as a top blogger, and he sets the standard for all blogs regardless of topic.

Wise Bread – Living Large on a Small Budget
A number of different bloggers contribute to various topics centred around personal finance, frugality, careers, family, etc. Includes product reviews and giveaways.

Photography

Dark Roasted Blend – a weird and wonderful photography blog
I’m always fascinated by what’s posted. The images are at times humorous and achingly beautiful art.

Publishing Industry

Trio of publishing blogs that I always enjoy.

Editorial Anonymous – A Children’s Book Editor
Mostly writes about being a children’s book editor, but if you’re interested in being published, there’s a lot of good information here. Takes the time to answer reader questions about things like why you don’t need to illustrate your picture book before sending it to a publisher, and what to say when an editor calls you and tells you they’re making an offer on your manuscript.

Editorial Ass – a recovering editorial assistant
Mix of personal anecdotes, publishing news and what it’s like to be an editor. Personable style that’s amusing and helpful.

Pub Rants – a literary agent blog
Publishing industry from an agent’s perspective (rather than editor like the previous two), this blog covers industry-specific information that an unpublished author needs to know about, such as advances, query letter etiquette, etc.

What are some of your favourite blogs that you check daily?

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Building an online presence

This past weekend I went to Fan Expo. My favourite part of this con is walking through Artists’ Alley and being surrounded by creativity and talent.

I’m in the process of creating a “geeky and creative” post, profiling the different people I met, but as I’ve been visiting everyone’s websites and etsy stores, I was struck by how different everyone’s online presence is, ranging from nonexistent to professional.

If you’re just starting out, it isn’t necessary to have a flash website that is professionally made, but there are a few things you can easily do.

1. Build a web presence

Others have written about this before, but it’s really easy to create a free blog on any number of journaling sites (wordpress, blogger, livejournal, dreamwidth), even if you’re not very tech savvy. Get in the habit of posting your work on a regular basis (even if it’s just monthly to start), and slowly increase the frequency to at least weekly.

If you’re handing out business cards of your work at a con, you need a website. I saw so many different artists and artisans, and I honestly can’t remember who is who. I need a visual reminder of your work, otherwise I won’t know why I took your card at the time and why I would want to follow up. If all you’ve provided is an email address, I’m going to recycle your card. This may seem unduly harsh, but I’m not likely to email you just to ask “what was it you were doing again?”.

2. Mention the con you just attended.

You don’t need to do a fancy write-up. All you need to do is mention somewhere on your site or etsy store that you’re in Toronto for Fan Expo for the weekend. I’ve noticed that the artists who took the time to update their readers, are the ones that generally have more content up on their sites. Even if you’re just starting out, it’s nice to give people context for what you’re doing. Artists were running out of business cards on the first day of a two-day con, which means that at least some of the people attending will visit your website. Tell us what you’re up to or that you’ll have new merchandise up after premiering it at the con. I’m pretty sure at least one person had a lot more items at their booth than show up at their etsy store, and I wasn’t that impressed with their current online selection. By giving an update (even just one line) you’ve given me a reason to check back.

I can already hear the protests of “but the product itself should be enough of a reason to go back”. Well, yes and no.
If you’ve spent any time on free online fiction websites, you’ll find that most of the writers who post stories will have a multi-chaptered work in progress. 80-90% of those never get finished, so I’ve become wary of those who don’t give me a reason to check back. Every artist has good intentions, but not everyone can follow-through with what they’ve started. If your website doesn’t seem like it’s updated frequently, then I’m going to assume that it isn’t. I’d rather spend my time on someone who provides steady content than on someone who has great ideas but they never make down on paper or online.

I actually find it a bit heartbreaking when I’m working with a client who has so many fantastic ideas, but there’s never any evidence of it, other than the conversation we’re having. I feel privileged that I can listen to a story unfold, but it’s a shame that others can’t share in this experience as well. At Fan Expo, there was so much talent, and with Valley of the Muse I’d love to showcase everyone that I talked to and give examples of how awesome they are. But if they don’t have an online presence, then I can’t do that, because I have nothing to link to, and I doubt anyone would listen to me if I said “trust me they’re fantastic!” without saying why.

If you’re starting out, you need to take that first step before you and your work can be discovered and that means don’t just work on your portfolio in the dark corners of your room until you’re ready to unveil your epic. Build relationships with people who are going to be excited for you and supportive of all your endeavors, even the earliest ones.

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I know a lot of musicians who spend ever waking moment rehearsing so that their sound is perfect. They invest in a lot of expensive equipment, practice with their bandmates so that they can sound tight, and when they’re on stage they pay attention to what’s coming out of their stage monitors. All of that focus on how they sound is what drives a great musical performance.

But it’s not enough.

Seeing a band live means that there is a visual component, and it’s not enough to pick out a snazzy outfit and headbang at appropriate moments. The opening band I saw had a lot of promise but some of the lead singers movements seemed like the kind of thing you saw at another show and thought they looked cool. They unfortunately didn’t, and just made him look twitchy and drunk.

I’m sure there are people that disagree and are able to tune out idiotic gyrating on stage, focusing on just the music, but if you’re performing and hoping to pick up new fans, you can’t risk alienating those who are visually-oriented. Especially, since it’s a fairly easy fix.

When you’re at the point where you’re no longer worried about how you sound as a band, set-up your rehearsal space so that it approximates a stage, and then set up a video camera in front so that it captures everyone’s movements. This isn’t just for the lead singer either – guitar and bassist can also detract from a performance by standing woodenly on stage, effectively draining out any energy the lead singer can whip up out of the audience. Once you’ve recorded a few songs, view them as a group. Critique the movements. Don’t just stop at “oh, that’s cool”, but really dig into what looks weird, what you do too often, what expression you thought looks soulful but doesn’t really work. When you’re done, keep the best ones, then think about what else you can do. Repeat until you look like pros.

Oh, and the headliner? Had fans set-up at the front of the stage, not because of the heat, but because it made the lead singers hair billow during the performance. In the hands of a less experienced band it would have looked cheesy, but for these guys it only made them look awesome. They had long curly hair, and more importantly their movements were unrushed and fluid, so that when they did stand back into the fans it only added to their performance, never detracting from it. Instead of picking apart their movement, I was able to sit back and enjoy the show.

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